Those who suffer from social anxiety often avoid talking when they don't have to. This can have the result of making them seem overly shy, sad, angry, snobbish, submissive, or mentally slow, when in reality they are probably none of those things.
The actual reasons why anxious people may not like to talk vary from person to person. However, some of the more common difficulties that people with anxiety encounter when it comes to talking are listed below, along with strategies for overcoming them.
Speech Problems and Incoherency
有趣的是,恐惧谈话往往存在于每种焦虑症中。它是最常见的与社交恐惧症相关,但焦虑通常会导致人们想要避免增加他们焦虑的东西 - 就像说话一样。
你有没有想过你想要分享,开始把它放进言语然后发现这些话似乎出来了错了?这不是焦虑人物的罕见问题。一个焦虑的人可能会充分能够在纸上清楚而雄辩地形成他们的句子,而且由于在社交场合中的高度压力,在公共场合发言时,它可以整合几句话。
这个问题导致他们造成恐惧,因为他们担心被判或说错了。他们可能会发现即使他们谈论,并掌握谈话,他们也会开始重新思考它,因为它们也发现了错误,即使他们做得很好,最终也能加强他们的恐惧。
It is a vicious cycle where you feel anxious about speaking, then you find that you can't speak because you're too anxious about speaking, then you become anxious about not being able to speak, and the cycle perpetuates itself. Even if you do manage to speak, over-attention applied to the mechanisms of speech (such as swallowing regularly and pausing to breathe) can actually cause you to do embarrassing things like spitting, choking or having to pause awkwardly in the middle of speaking, causing your speaking phobia to increase even further.
In order to halt the cycle, try saying the words in your head clearly before you say them aloud. If you have a presentation or speech to give, try practicing it a few times beforehand so that you are familiar with what you are going to say. If you stumble or stutter, smile or shake your head to show that you are at ease with yourself even though you have misspoken, and just keep talking. If you visibly panic or become upset others may feel uncomfortable and the situation could become more tense. Also remember that even confident, seemingly fearless people do stutter or misspeak occasionally.
心灵倒空
大多数人在他们的生命中至少遇到过一次这一现象:在给予重要演讲时,请问你的老板提高,或者试图终于问你在咖啡店每天都看到可爱的人或女孩。你不可避免地张开嘴,发现那里绝对没有。对于患有焦虑的人来说,可以每次张开嘴。
Not only is every social interaction fraught with the same kind of stress and pressure that most people only feel in extreme circumstances, but even the fear of that blank mind and the social awkwardness that it can create can keep an anxious person from even trying to speak.
If this sounds like you, you may want to try this simple grounding exercise. When you are in a situation where you know you need to speak (in a meeting at work or out with a group of people), but find that you are too panicked about speaking to keep the words in your head (or are too afraid of losing them once the spotlight is on you), just look around you and name (in your mind) the things that catch your eye: floor, table, desk, chair. Name them confidently and focus on that feeling of stability and correctness, allowing yourself to realize that you know exactly how to say the right thing on cue, and then use that confidence you have just built to speak your mind aloud.
Inability to Put Thoughts into Words
有时当你急于和经常遇到上面提到的问题时,你就不会让你的想法放在现场的文字中。您习惯于有时间排序并衡量所有的想法,并且在您绝对自信并致力于您所说的内容之前,不要感觉良好。
事实是,口语不像在页面上写字或头脑中的思想思想。大家都听到了语言的话,你无法抹去它们或把它们带回。然而,其他人一直这样做。如果你对你所谓的意见感到不舒服,你的宣传可能不是你完全确定的东西,你可以说你不确定,或者你可以将你的陈述作为一个问题。语言附带各种漏洞:它只是练习,了解如何有效使用它们。
In addition, practice is all you need to get good at condensing the thoughts you are having into a few succinct, bite-size ideas. It's important to remember that you don't have to serve up everything in your entire mind to your audience like a giant steak on a platter. Try cutting it into smaller, easier-to-digest pieces so that people can engage with your ideas more easily and not be overwhelmed by the sheer amount of thoughts you are sharing, causing awkward silences that only make you feel more anxious.
Feelings of Inferiority
Sometimes we can find ourselves feeling inferior to those around us. This may be caused by inexperience, lack of self-confidence, or being faced with a new or unfamiliar situation. This could lead to feelings of sadness, anger, resentment or embarrassment, and any of those emotions will understandably make you want to be quiet around others.
While feeling inferior is a common experience it is also harmful to you. While it is certainly true that others may be better than you at some things, the truth is that everyone has strengths and weaknesses, and even if you are inexperienced or lack self-confidence, you do have something worthwhile to contribute. Try concentrating on the things you value about yourself, or the things you admire about others and it may give you the confidence and motivation that you need to finally speak.
Fear of Being Judged
被评判是恐惧下面以上焦虑的大部分原因。我们不断被告知别人认为是什么并不重要,同时被告知第一印象是一切。此外,您知道您认为其他人对您与他们互动的方式产生巨大影响的事实。
However, it is important to also consider the fact that other people can surprise you and completely alter the way you think of them simply by saying something you wouldn't have expected from them, suddenly making them seem smarter, friendlier, or more relatable. If you don't allow yourself to build on the impressions you make with people by shutting up the instant you feel that you have been judged, whatever negative judgment has been made will unquestionably remain unchanged. Furthermore, it is important to remember that we are often our own worst critics. The judgement you pass on yourself is likely worse than any judgements others may make.
此外,您所说的越多,您将越多,您将留下别人并被他们所享有的好评。你将能够征服你对被判判断并发现自己没有恐惧的恐惧(在负面的光线)上,而是因为你真的是。
学习改变你的恐惧和行为
改变你的行为可能是可怕的,特别是当你习惯于一种方式而且没有任何练习做任何事情的时候。改变你的思想和社会行为可能需要时间,而且它可能并不总是有趣,但实际上,你已经是一个能够在社会环境中舒适地说话的人:一个有思想和意见和声带的人。你不必尝试成为:你已经是的。
当练习将你的想法和意见放在世界进入世界时,请注意你的勇敢在做的勇敢程度上是如何激发别人做同样的事情。找到强大的意识到每个人都需要有点帮助勇敢地说出真正的想法。并承认您的思想和意见有价值,不仅争取对话,而且促成与周围人的社会互动。
Here are some tips that can help you overcome your fear of talking:
- Start StrongIf you go to an event and you're determined to talk, start talking from the outset. Don't wait for that opportune moment. People easily fall into habits, and if you start talking immediately you'll often find it becomes much easier over time.
- 得到一个支持性的朋友研究表明,在公共交谈时,这些人被亲密朋友所爱和支持的人更有信心。他们不担心被判断,因为他们知道与他们的另一个人将永远为他们感到骄傲。找到支持的朋友,你将更容易调整。
- 轻松进入它Many people find it easy to speak to a friend, and it is harder to talk in groups. Once you have that friend, work with them to add more and more people around you over time until you get more confident. For example, start with one friend, then add another friend, then have them add a stranger and so on. Spend time talking in a small group, growing it until you get used to talking.
- Start Small你不需要进入冗长的谈话。That can create anxiety which leads to you not wanting to speak. Try starting small and keeping it simple. If it evolves into a lengthy conversation then great but by starting off short and simple it allows people the opportunity to engage with you, often making it easier to speak.
By following these steps you may begin to address your social anxiety and open the door to feeling more confident about speaking with others. Change takes time but with each positive experience your confidence will grow, making it that much easier to talk the next time.
概括:
Social anxiety is a fear around people. Other forms of anxiety can also cause self-esteem issues and fear of unexplained situations. These and other reasons are why anxiety may lead to a fear of talking. Depending on the type of anxiety, there are different strategies that might help reduce speaking fears. Anxiety reduction strategies can also help.